Deh Nite Watchman and Scarlettkitty

Miz KittyRoo roted dis lubblee storee.  

For Dayle:

Dusk is falling on Cheezland, and although it is nearly Spring there is a bit of a chill in the air. The Night Watchman pulls his coat close.

“We have someone coming, Winky”, he tells the black cat on his shoulder.

The Watchman strolls through the streets, past the JCH4K fountain, splashing softly in the last golden rays, past the shuttered shops and homes, toward the meadow.

As he approaches the meadow, he hears the music of the carousel. Nearer, he sees a sweet, sad lady astride one of the cats. A pair of calico kittens is nestled in her lap. He climbs onto the neighboring horse and they go around a turn or two in silence.

… “I shouldn’t be here” she says. “My family needs me and I miss my husband so much.”

“You must be Dayle” he says. “Your family loves you beyond measure and they miss you too. They know you weren’t ready. You were so strong for so many for so long, your heart couldn’t contain all the love. “

“My grandbabies”, she says plaintively. “Who will watch them now?”

“So many people loved you – someone will step up because it meant so much to you”, he replies and Winky murrs hur assent.

“I hope so” she says. “They are so special”

“Your husband is very sad”, says the Watchman “ He has the love you gave him, and more, to help him through.”

The carousel slows to a stop, and they alight from their mounts and stroll into the meadow itself, a-bud and abloom with spring blossoms, with kitties and puppies frolicking amongst the stems. In the distance a few horses are clustered around a patch of clover and alfalfa.

“Dear lady” says the Night Watchman. “It’s your turn to rest, and to wait for your loved ones to come to you. You can peek at them as much as you like from this side of the bridge. I’ve heard there will be many gardens growing in your honor.”

The lady smiles and settles onto a bench at the edge of the meadow, with the calico babies still cuddled close.

“Thank you”, she says, caressing the little kittens in her lap.

The Watchman starts back into the meadow, followed by a string of cats and dogs eager to play.

The Love I Left Behind

MamaCat sendinged dis message frum a kitteh tu mii tu b posted heer on deh Cheez Town Cryer.  Shii duzn’t know who roted it, but it wuz obviously a well lubbed pet.

Before humans die, they write their last will and testament and give their home and all they have to those they leave behind.  If, with my paws I could do the same, this is what I’d give:


— To a poor and lonely stray I’d give my happy home, my bowl, my cozy bed, my soft pillows and all my toys; the lap, which I loved so much, and the tender loving hands; the hand that stroked my fur and the sweet voice which called my name; and I’d will to the sad and scared shelter animal the place I had in my human’s loving heart of which there seemed no bounds.


So when I die, please do not say, “I will never have a pet again for the loss and pain is more than I can stand.” Instead, go find an unloved animal — one whose life has held no joy or hope and give my place to him.  This is the only thing I can give – the love I left behind.

LOL Around the Clock

Dis song lamenting deh loss uv community on ICHC landinged in mai inbox tuday frum JD:

I wish tu offer dis protest song foar teh Cheez Town Crier songbuk. Iz a sober, qwiet reflekshun on teh nummer ob powstings to ICHC.

One o’clock, two o’clock, three o’clock, LOL!
Four o’clock, five o’clock, six o’clock, LOL!
Seven o’clock, eight o’clock, nine o’clock, LOL!
Wanna LOL around the clock tonight!

Not too many, not too few,
Just the right number of lols to view

Gonna LOL right round the clock tonight
Need three hours for comment delight
I wanna LOL around the clock tonight

Drop the excess, drop the dull,
We want the LOLs that we can mull

Gonna LOL right round the clock tonight
Need three hours for comment delight
I wanna LOL around the clock tonight

You’ve elebenty sites, maybe more
Why bombard us to a snore?

Gonna LOL right round the clock tonight
Need three hours for comment delight
I wanna LOL around the clock tonight

Cats cause mayhem, splorts and fun
Page overload just makes me want to run

Gonna LOL right round the clock tonight
Need three hours for comment delight
I wanna LOL around the clock tonight

Riting Project

hmmm…..  dis lookz interesting….  it am frum Hissy Fit:


Mi leege:
It hab bin manee munfs sinse ai hab bin aktib at ICHC, butt ai iz offen lurking.  Bisee, bisee, bisee!   Ai no cheezepeeps r da bestest fur halpin!   Mai boi hab maded a websiet/blog fur a summer skool projekt adn hii iz ritin a fantasy storee – muchly leik Artimis Fowl adn/or Eragon.  Hii will git extree credits iffin peeps reed it.  Culd yu postify da linkee on da Cryer?  Butt pleeze to reminding that himz onlee eleben adn not tu expeckt Jrr Tolkien!  Dere’s no bad langwage or situations, so  peeps kan show dere kidlets iffin day wantz.
Fanks eber so muches,
HissyFit  (and BroverFit)

London-Based LOLCat Focus Groups!

Dis interesting bit camed in mai emayoz dis morning.

OH HAI, Cheezfrend!

My name is Kate Miltner, I’m a graduate student at the London School of Economics. I’m writing my Masters dissertation on lolcats, and I am trying to recruit as many London-based lolcat lovers as possible for some focus groups that I’m running in the next few weeks. Will over at ICHC suggested that I contact you and ask for your help in getting the word out to the community– would you be willing to help me by posting an announcement? I’m offering snacks and a chance to win an Amazon giftcard, as well as a chance to talk about lolcats (and lolruses, and lolsloths, etc) for an hour!

Please let me know if you have any questions– you can post this email address ( as a way for all interested cheezfrends to get in touch.


I haz nawt had contact wif Kate b4, but dis appearz tu b a legitimate school; its webby site am  If I libbed in Lundon, I wud definitely go, if only fur deh snakkz!  😉